Choice vs. Destiny

It’s been a while since I wrote my last self-reflective journal.

In our lives, we sometimes think about how we become what we are. And the answer is always through the contradicting ideas of the natural and the human influence. Some people would think that we are destined to be what we are at present. Others would think that it was choice that brought us to our present state.

I believe that everything is relative in this world. We might not recognize our very origins yet as hundreds or even thousands of generations pass by, our birth only seems to be our destiny. But we don’t understand that our lives are all up in the air.

We are destined to have a mind to be able to think, a free will to be able to choose and an uncertainty that we have to find out for ourselves and understand. It comes along with us as we are born… We are born with a worldview that our parents didn’t really make for us. We are born as individuals; we are embedded with the “self” idea because of that.

For this, I believe that our lives are not caused by destiny. After all, we are given minds and free wills and individual worldviews and perceptions. We are given the opportunity to choose what kind of lives we are supposed to have and preserve for the rest of our lives and hopefully will be inherited (not destined) to the future generations.

We live in a world filled with many directions and paths that will lead us into different lives. We are all able to become anything in this world. There are so many opportunities that we human beings can grab… all we have to do is to grab it and culminate ourselves to become the people who we want to be, who we think we should be, who we aspire to be, who we are willing to end up to be.

And the key really is “choice”…. not “destiny”…

Destiny is the result of our choice - and for that, we choose our destinies.

How should this help people in their pursuit towards the understanding of life?

The self is part of one’s life… You are part of your own life. Why do you always think of being enslaved? Why do you think of being predestined? You can make choices, it’s part of your free will! And most importantly, you can change your life overall; you can change your whole personality; you can pursue a different path in life…

What brings you there are the opportunities… the options… you see them around you, trying to inspire you, trying to draw you into a wild world, into a certainty which you might have never considered in your life to happen. You are given the chance to bore out and patch up the holes in your life.

Do not worry about what life has in store for you because there is uncertainty and you can always use choice through free will to fill up that uncertainty and tell yourself that life isn’t all about destinies - it’s all about choices.

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If you’re just wondering…

With regards to love life, I’m pretty sure this applies. Taking advantage of your opportunities will lead you into bumping on a person who might have recognized those opportunities as well and grabbed it along with you.

I have met and almost got close with about a couple of girls… but it’s sad because I rather choose not to commit for now and focus a lot on my studies. Though it’d be lovely though that I would be inspired in my studies a lot by a girl who I’d like to treasure in my life.

Cheers!

Literature and Film brings passion!

I read books, watch films and play video games in order to learn a lot about life and be able to know how people react and feel in different situations. It brings passion!

Through novels by Paulo Coelho and Banana Yoshimoto, I learn about the intricacies of life through how people struggle and face the harshness of challenges in life. Yet we still stay strong to be able to do what we normally do in our everyday lives.

Through international films, I get to learn about different cultures and value empathy. We all act differently depending on how we are raised and what we are involved with in our environment. It’s not just natural as a lot of people would argue.

Through video games, I test out my senses and act out willingly to reach the goals that I’ve been asked to.

Passion is all about emotions and how we perceive them or execute them. Through literature, film and video games, we do become emphatic, knowledgeable and sensitive.

Prayer for Peace (St. Francis of Assisi)

Prayer for peace by St. Francis of Assisi

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace.
Where there is hatred, let me sow love
Where there is injury, pardon
Where there is doubt, faith
Where there is despair, hope
Where there is darkness, light
Where there is sadness, joy

O Divine Master,
Grant that I may not so much seek
To be consoled, as to console
To be understood, as to understand
To be love, as to love.

For it is in giving that we receive
It is in pardoning that we are pardoned
It is in dying that we are born to eternal life.

Being born destined to be a Catholic is definitely a mystery for me. But I don’t think I can replace what I grew up with; I can only learn about other religions but not totally immerse myself to them. But that’s for another day.

God for me is not someone who literally helps me in life. God is my inspiration through the works of His Son Jesus Christ, His Mother Mary and all the saints including St. Francis of Assisi. By being inspired by God, I find myself to look for what is right: Love God, Love your neighbour, Take Care of God’s gifts - nature & talent, and be able to become a good role model to everyone - I chose that over being a preacher though I am the latter in many cases.

What the Prayer for Peace teaches me is the fact that God loves Peace.

And if God loves Peace, then peace has to be very important in our lives.

Through peace, there is forgiveness, understanding, healing, reconciliation and giving - all of them are told and implied in the poem. It’s not too much of a responsibility neither do we have to be naturally forgiving and understanding. This is what peace is all about as it is told by the prayer.

There are people who define for themselves what peace is all about. I do it myself too but you won’t really understand peace unless you experience it not just in St. Francis’ prayer, but in all the various horizons that we consider whether it’s from writing or it’s from real life experiences.

Peace of mind, that is what peace also tries to achieve.

I will be going out there in the world trying to struggle for another job. And I definitely needed to always have a peace of mind in all of my decisions in life, in all of the risks that I will take, in all the mistakes that I will make and in how I will fix all those mistakes. My life is revolving fast and I definitely need to find my own right place in this world - I don’t necessarily call it destiny.

Through peace of mind, and peace itself, I will be able to find the perfect ways of writing, of drawing, of meeting people, of speaking to people, of doing well my work, and eventually, of having a romantic relationship.

Through the Prayer for Peace, God loves peace and peace achieves peace of mind.
I love this life because peace still has its own way of revealing in our lives.

Japan’s Cellphone Technology

Check this one out.

Japanese cellphones are definitely getting a lot crazier with their models and designs.

I’m pretty sure I know the function of the QR Codes - the so-called mosaic-like bar codes which brings you into a “cellphone sized” website when you access it. But I definitely am amazed with the other features that these Japanese cellphones have today. You can use them as a GPS System and have it as an alternate to your credit card or even your cash.

Here in Canada, we do enjoy the progress of cellphones. There are MP3 Cellphones where you can listen to music with your cellphone and you can cut your music for a while when someone’s calling you. There are also these hand held devices called Blackberry which is a palm device/cellphone. Of course all these cellphones can connect to the internet and some cellphones do have photo and video features.

But I bet Japan have already thought of this and they are growing a lot more as time passes by.

(First Video: ~music~ “Feather” by Nujabes)

(Second Video: courtesy of CBC)

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Yet there’s another issue, Japanese obsession with cellphones. For this, I found this video of two Japanese students presenting a project about cellphone obsession within the Japanese society. They interviewed people and made a survey which is good enough to prove their argument. They are speaking English in this video but Japanese in their interviews. It’s nothing to worry about though since we can access the whole video in English either way (some through subtitles).

enjoy…

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Oh Wait! I saw this video about a cell phone sold in Germany.

…it’s just a joke hehehe. Though I like the homosexual meter and how you can detonate it when someone steals the phone from you.

Sticks and Stones

“Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me.”

I was wondering before if there would be any quotes or passages that would relate to my belief that words are only utterances and blots of ink. I got this quote after hearing “Sticks and Stones” from a very successful Broadway show called “Avenue Q”. I heard this when Trekkie Monster was called a pervert by Kate Monster for using the Internet for porn - thus came the famous song called “The Internet is for Porn”. Just like Trekkie Monster, I did experience being called names and yet it never went into my mind to throw a punch at someone’s face or flick a knee on someone’s balls.

I detest people who would threat me with a punch in the face in exchange for mere words. It’s even more difficult when in a certain discussion/debate, I don’t realize I began throwing my passions rather than my intelligence - which makes me look like an arrogant person. But you can’t really put out a fire with fire and I feel so disappointed that some of the people I debate with don’t find the time to relax and reflect on what was discussed at hand and what messages are supposed to be sent and to which party - i.e. looking for the main point and see what we value so that understanding can kick in.

Sorry I got no time to tell a story, but I guess we have to accept the fact that people do get hurt with words and they will claim that they have the right to fight back with violence - some at a certain degree.

But words are words.

Nature & The Human Encroachment

Have you ever wondered about how great nature is? This question was raised after I watched a documentary on the Great Lakes which is located between Canada and the US. No one would deny I guess that nature is a great thing and it is beneficial towards the health and well-being of the people. There’s more wonder with nature rather than with man-made objects which we nowadays see especially when we are living in the city.

I always get so upset with learning that God wants the people to go ahead and multiply here on earth. Was that a trick played on us humans? Did God tell us a bad joke? Doesn’t He know that He’s letting the people destroy nature by actually letting us multiply? Did we human beings had to realize for ourselves for so long the effects of overpopulating this world so that we could actually start using condoms and go to family planning workshops?

Which leads me to this question: If nature is going to ask you to die for the sake of maintaining its beauty and it’s wonder, would you do it?

Nature is a beautiful thing and it brings peace of mind to those who are living in pain, stress, distress, disappointment, anxiety, anger, fear and displeasure. It brings forth a lot more meaning to art as the saying goes “nature imitates art”.

But the human beings are destroying it because of the uncompromising pursuit for progress which would have to cost several hectares of wild forests, a thousand habitats, and a thousand kilograms of beautiful rocks. If there aren’t that much people in this world, nature would still be beautiful. Or if we couldn’t just avoid it, if people knew what to do with nature, we would still live side-by-side with the wonders that fill our souls with peace and astonishment.

For this (in diversion to the real issue), I also think it’s a far better way to die for the sake of nature rather than for the sake of ideologies and organized religious beliefs. It’s much better to sacrifice for the uncertain rather than for something that we might carry unconsciously as a lie.

Lessons from the Rubik’s Cube

I was able to solve a Rubik’s Cube tonight and this would be the third time. There was a few cheating involved - I was consulting the website which I put in my “Sites of Interest”. But nonetheless, I never really thought I would see my own Rubik’s cube look like when I bought it for the very first time.

What I learned through the dreaded cube is that it measures our thinking abilities - logical, mathematical, scientific, etc. For some of us, we could only reach as far as the multiplication table (for lack of figurative language) and the reason for that is because we don’t have enough learning experience to back up the ability that is expected of the puzzle.

In the beginning, I only know how to solve the top and the first two layers of the sides of the cube relying on what makes sense to me and what knowledge I have (without knowing the notion of algorithms and maintaining a certain level of ability in puzzle-solving).

So I learn more about algorithms, I learn more about techniques, I learn the solution, I get the whole idea, all I have to do is to fully involve myself and make sure that I do understand how to solve it. When I get to solve it, it’s like being able to do what is impossible. I regretted the idea that there is no possibility that I can solve the Rubik’s cube.

For this, it just proves my philosophy that if we believe in the possibilities of life, then nothing is impossible.

That goes with everything else in life. We just accept the fact that we are what we are. But I don’t think it’s to our benefit really to have that kind of mentality.

Life is full of possibilities. The only key towards making the impossible “possible” is learning and experience. In this perception of life, we treat the bizarre as something that cannot be underestimated, and we do not allow human development to remain stagnant. The result is that we can do what is impossible.

Now, I think that IT IS POSSIBLE for me to solve the Rubik’s cube, and I did through expanding my knowledge and understanding. Shouldn’t we treat our problems in life (and all aspects of life) like that as well?

Hobbies

For me, it’s always a great thing to have hobbies. But since I met this friend of mine who is well versed with life, I suddenly realized that hobbies aren’t just something that will bring you towards a relaxing state. Hobbies are supposed to educate people as it provides entertainment and leisure to bored people.

What does it mean to collect music? What does it mean to collect and read books? to learn languages? to play hackeysack? to play sports? to play chess and other board games? to roam around the city? to go hiking? to assemble toys? to research about stuff?

The very aim of hobbies is to make lives a lot more productive. For me, I definitely want to develop a lot of my skills and abilities through my hobbies and I’m glad that is actually the right way to think about it.

Right now, I’m reading novels and studying languages. It’s a hard thing for me to actually do the effort of doing these activities but the reward is that I become a lot higher in life than before when I didn’t even consider to commit myself to these activities.

- i’m a bit sleepy so i’ll have to stop here for now, sorry guys -

Good Command of the English Language

I always feel defeated whenever I see job offerings that has expectations such as:

* Has Good Command of the English Languages

* Excellent Communications Skills

* Fluency in English

How is it to be able to have excellent skills in English? One of the ways is reading. One reads to be able to familiarize themselves with words and expressions that can be used in everyday life and in everyday interaction with people.

Sad to say, I hate reading and I have to admit that my brain is always lazy to do anything productive in order for me to mature as a person I’m supposed to be.

My brother do have a good command in the English language, of course he grew up here and is probably more productive with his studies than I am despite him hanging out with his techie stuff in his room. I’m happy for him though don’t get me wrong. I can never envy my brother, in fact, if he asks help from me, I’d give it to him anytime as long as I’m not busy myself - which would most likely be an excuse, yet I won’t let him take advantage of that fact.

I always tried to reflect on a lot of things and it’s really annoying because I get sleepy when I do that. Do I have to be healthy? Am I lacking some kind of requirement in order to have the energy to become productive everyday of my life?

What makes me so worried about the idea of having a good command of the English language?

Last year, I joined in a speed reading workshop which took place in my university. I felt so great when I realized that I can read faster when I do leisure reading. But the sad part is that I do leisure reading on books which are not related to school such as novels and books talking about other stuff.

I reflected on that a lot and noticed that I felt that need to catch up in life. I wanted to relate myself to what other people are saying and make the right inferences in every utterance I hear from them.

Right now, I’m planning to go into this leadership program where I can train myself to become a better public speaker and a better communicator since it is needed in the workplace, in the community and in relationships. I only hope things will change once I finish that program, but there’s something else that I am so worried about.

I just don’t feel like pursuing anything! I just don’t feel like being productive! I just don’t feel like I can do anything because I don’t have the right knowledge and skills to be able to do them - all because I don’t pursue those knowledge and skills.

Ever since I became slightly independent, I figured it’s not something I really like. My parents raised me so that I can obey them and that one day I will be enslaved to my parents’ house being a family guy praying with them everyday and having no fun whatsoever all because I’m at home doing nothing interesting and adventure-like.

I want to get out of the house completely and meditate on things myself really.

I want to be able to bring out that real talent that I have so that I can disregard the requirement of communicating with fluency in the workplace.

…

I guess I’m my own worst critic.